Look for the interview with Paula Renaye, author of
The Hardline Self Help Handbook: What Are You Willing to Do to Get What You Really Want? on Monday 11 July 2011.
The Law of Attraction is all well and good, but it doesn’t work for everybody. Or most people, actually. But that doesn’t mean that the rest of us are out of luck. The methods of The Hardline Self Help Handbook by Paula Renaye can help you get through the stuff that is keeping you stuck and help you move into the future of your making.
I’ve always wanted there to be a magic wand to make my ideal life appear. But coming up through life the way I have, I also know that nothing worth having comes easy.
Many people will say “I’ll do anything to [have/do/be]…” But that isn’t the truth. They won’t do anything. And it is this limiting belief that helps keep them from reaching what they want.
What are you not willing to do? To counter the realization that there are some things you are not willing to do or give up, Paula asks you to list what you’re not willing to give up. In my case, I realized that the things I was not willing to give up were the choices I was making to keep in my life, and those choices have a cost. This cut some resentments I was starting to harbor off at the knees.
If it’s broken, fix it. This seems obvious, but how many things are broken in your life that you just put up with, knowing you will fix it some day? This can be anything from minor annoyances to the major stuff. In my case, I was inspired to take action to get my gutters cleaned, get the smudge of yogurt (?) off my side mirror and get a handle on my reading. Paula has you examine what is broken in your life
You become who your friends are. In this section, Paula examines the influence of people around you. We all have the Debbie Downers at work, those people who feel it is their job to whine and complain. I saw the affect of two of them first hand at work. Two people who had handed in their notice spent the last two weeks complaining about how bad the job was, etc. Everyone that wandered into their cube area started complaining as well. Paula gives some concrete strategies to deal with this.
Have you ever said “That Makes Me Sick!” Would you say it if it were really true? What about “you’re a pain in the neck?” Would you say that if you knew you would have real pains in the neck? We internalize our emotions, and they pop out in various ways in our bodies. Paula has you look at the mind and body connection.
Bite the bullet. Wouldn’t it be nice if we had, or could hear, a best friend who would really tell us what we needed to hear? Someone to tell us “life isn’t fair, get over it!” Sometimes we just need to hear the hard truth and get on with it. This list of bullets is a dose of cold water.
What is it you want? Once you get through the stuff that is keeping you stuck, you have to know what you are going for. And how exactly do you get it? Nothing substitutes for the hard work, but you can keep your dreams in front of you, reminding you where you are going with vision boards and vision scripts.
But what if I get stuck? Once you are on the right path, there are lots of techniques you can use to get unstuck. The list is a good starting place to get moving again.
So what can you do right now? Take some time and list five things that you are not willing to change about your life. Everything is on the table here. Consider if you are willing to give up a relationship, a home, where you live, what you do, everything. See if they answers shock you as they did me.
Book: The Hardline Self Help Handbook
Author: Paula Renaye
Publisher: Diomo Books
Paula Renaye provided me with a free copy of the book through YP Publishing to enable me to write this review.